Sunday, August 26, 2012

Start of a big week

I've been ready for this week to get here and dreading it also.  I'm having surgery Friday.  I'm not looking forward to it but want to get it over with as soon as possible.  R suggested putting it off for a while and I looked at him like he was crazy.  It not like this is something I want to do but I don't want to put it off any longer.  I want it over with, I want to know that I don't have cancer.  I want to know that I'm not going to have to have a hysterectomy.  The parts may not work for us to have kids - yeah we did all the fertility stuff.  The expensive drugs and procedures.   Nothing worked.  The doctor's said we were incompatible.  How's that for an explanation?  We just think they couldn't figure out why they couldn't get us pregnant (stupid doctor's).  I know that one of the many side effects of the drugs I was taking is the increased risk of cervical cancer, so keeping fingers crossed that whatever it is the the doctor found is not cancerous.

Oh, yeah and my birthday is this week.  R keeps asking me what I want.  I just want the surgery to go okay and everything to be fine.  I have everything I need when he is with me.  Yeah, there are many things I want but right now I just need him by my side.

Wish me luck and I'll try to give an update after the surgery Friday.