Close calls

So today was full of close calls.  My Dad is sick and my Mom had a minor surgery scheduled for today so she called me yesterday morning to she if I could take her.  She, of course, said you can just take me and drop me off and then come back and get me".  Sure Mom - like I'm going to do something like that to you.  Now my sister or brother would have but then that's way Mom doesn't call them when she or Dad needs help.

So I get out to my parents house very very early this morning and as we are leaving I fall down the stairs of the deck.  (close call #1) They only have one tiny light that doesn't light up anything, so it was very dark and you couldn't see anything.  You would think living in the house since I was 13, I would have remembered the # of steps but nope - down I went.  So we went back into the house to brush off the dirt and get a flash light so we could see where we were going this time.  We made it to the car without problems this time. 

Driving to the surgery center.  I'm driving a little over the speed limit (5 miles) on side roads (not the hwy) and I've been watching for deer this whole time as this is the time of day they start to move around.  I glance down for a second and when I glance back up - all I see is deer ass.  Mom is gasping.  And the deer is gone with just a scuff on the passenger side of the car.  (close call #2).  I was just glad we had both gone to the bathroom before we left the house.

Finally make to the surgery center.  Get Mom checked in and they take us back, Mom to her room and me to the special waiting room.  This is 7:45am cst.  They have to take Mom back 3 times before the biopsy comes back clean of cancer cells.  There is at least a 45 minute wait in between the times they take her back to the room as they have a lab to check the biopsy they've cut out.  The second time they brought her back she got her Valium out and took 2.  After about 20 minutes, she was feeling much calmer and very sleepy.  She was really scared when the nurse came and said the 3rd time to say they still need to take more.  I had to take the nurse aside to let her know about the Valium, she was glad Mom had taken it.  Hour after 3rd time into the room, the nurse came back to say that it came back clean.  They had finally gotten to cancer free cells.  (close call #3).  They took Mom back to stitch her up (another hour).  Then I got her in the car only to, of course, have to stop and get a prescription (why can't they call these in before you have these things done so you don't have to stop on your way home?)  Stopped to pick up some lunch for all of us as I didn't want Mom to try to fix something (it's her kitchen you know).  Finally got her into bed at 2:30pm.  Took me another 1 to get home.  I was going to go to work after I took my Mom home but since I get off at 4, thought it would be a little stupid to drive all the way to work for 1/2 an hour.

So it's warming up left overs for R for dinner and than a soak in the tub for me.  My butt and thigh hurt from the fall and I'm sure I'll have some wonderfully colorful bruises in the next few days.  Mom and I will have to compare.  They told her she would have two black eyes by Sunday.

Good to be alive and I'm sure I'll dream off deer butt tonight.

Weekend Ramblings

It was a beautiful weekend here.  The weather was nice enough to still hang the sheets out on the line.  There is nothing better than line dried sheets.  They smell so good, just want to hold them up to my nose and inhale as long as I can to keep the scent fresh in my mind. 

We took my car in Friday night for normal maintenance and an oil change.  I not sure how that all added up to $450 but dang so glad we have 90 days same as cash.  R doesn't allow any amount to stay on a credit card if we will get finance charge.  This has really helped keep us out of debt.  It's sucked sometimes when I've really really wanted something but that's just it, I "wanted it" not "needed it".  He's never denied me something I needed (He's made me wait to get it - LOL).  So that was the only outing I had to make this weekend, to go pick up the car Saturday. 

Cleaned house and re-potted some plants.  We seem to be able to grow aloe vera plants.  I'll see if I can find a picture of when I first brought it home and I'll take one of it now.  It bloomed this summer.  My understanding is that they don't bloom very often.  I need to find some homes for all the baby aloe vera plants we have now.  I think last count was 22 and we just re-potted 4 more.  I don't want them to die but I'm running out of room for them. 

R decided I had been a good so I deserved a spanking.  It was wonderful.  He hadn't spanked me all week, maybe that was why I was in a funk or it could just be all the stress at work.  I'll have to mention that the spanking helped and maybe we'll talk again about maintenance spankings.  R still can't get over his ad-version to"hitting" me.  I know, I know it is not hitting but to him it is.  R grew up in a house hold that you never hit a female.  But he is working on it because he knows I want to be spanked - no I need to be spanked and he is the only one that I will let do it.  Plus R would never let anyone ever touch me so he said he would be the only one to spank me. 

Sunday was a lazy day but R was very happy I baked home made chocolate chip cookies.  When I bake it's not from a box (boxes are for storage and moving).  If I'm going to bake it's going to be from scratch,  That's how I grew up.  I can taste a box cake mix - heck I can smell it before I take a bite of it.  What is great about the chocolate chip cookies is that I make a double batch so I can put a gallon size bag in the freezer for later.  Warming them up in the microwave for 10 seconds, is like just taking them out of the oven.  Hot, gooey yummy.  Now I'm getting hungry for one.  :)

I think next weekend I'll make Oatmeal Raisin Cookies from R's mothers recipe.  She had a great recipe that R loves.  He may have to work Saturday so it would be a great surprise for him when he got home.

Well, I'd better get back to work.  Yes, I'm blogging from work.   If they want me to do the job of 3 people then I'm going to take breaks to relieve the stress.  







 

So why do I take it personal?

So I don't often leave comments on others blogs but sometimes I do.  I try to keep my comments short, simple to the point and not drone on about off topic things.  So why does it bother me when they have it set up that the comments have to be approved and my comment doesn't make the cut? 

I don't know these people.  Granted I've been reading their blogs for some time, normally before I will make a comment.  Or I'll comment that I've just started reading their blog and am enjoying it.

I know that I'm no Nora Roberts of flowing prose.  But I'm honest in my opinions and comments I leave.  Just another of my stupid insecurities.  Why do I need the approval of someone I don't know, of something I said, that they don't seem to care about any way?  I've got to get a thicker skin or maybe leave my comments as anonymous from now on, but I hate when people do that, if you don't want to claim the words than don't write them.  I think I use correct punctuation and always use spell check.  I try to make sure I re-read before I post anything. 

Blah - Bite me if you don't like my comments.

The death of the Hitachi

So I killed another one.  This is the second one in 6 months.  I sent the first one back because it didn't even last two weeks.  I mean come on.  They know what we buy them for and they are not cheap.  But they sure don't last. 

R is trying to fix it.  LOL  He is sitting on the other side of the bar right now with the hitachi taken apart, trying to figure out why it quit working.  He did say it over heated.  And it did pop a couple of times the other day  and he did find that some of the wires twisted up in it.  I would think they would make it so the wire wouldn't twist up and short the thing out (especially when it is being used). 

I think I'll go back to the little rocket vibes that are cheap but work great.  At least they aren't plugged into electricity and won't short out when they are being used. 

Something to be said for batteries and rocket vibes.  I won't be wasting any more money on another Hitachi if R can't get this one fixed.  Hope no one stops by tonight with it spread out over the bar.  :)

A cat like weekend

I was a cat this weekend.  I was lazy.  I lounged around the house.  I didn't leave the house - okay I stepped outside the house to get the cats in and to help "R" hang up the sheets and towels on the line.  But I was very cat like this weekend. 

With the layoffs at work on Monday, I just wanted to wallow in self pity.  Why them and not me?  Then I didn't want to think at all, I just wanted to lay in the sun beams with the cats (yes, they did share them with me). 

I spent most of the weekend laying around reading with a cat on me.  I think they knew I needed comforting.  She would just look at me, blink her beautiful gold eyes and purr.  Then she'd start working her very sharp claws into my arms, stomach, legs or whatever she happened to have her front paws on at the time.  Yes, she really loves me. 

Thankfully "R" understood my need to just "BE".  And he was able to handle taking care of himself before we married and hasn't forgotten how to do those things so he was able to find the wash machine and do the laundry this weekend.  Granted the rest of the house didn't get cleaned but a quick vacuum is all it needs. 

I might the rest of his needs (I'm sure you can figure those out for yourself).  LOL  And I think that is also why he left me be a lazy cat this weekend.  Oh, and I did fix him a big breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast Sunday morning.  Guess this cat was hungry. 

Survivors guilt from layoff?

Can one get survivors guilt from surviving a layoff at work?  Yesterday they laid off 1/3 of my department.  I'm one of the few who was left standing in the office helping my few former co-workers clean out their desks.  Granted by this time, there had been so many lay offs that there were only 6 of us left (they let one go last month).   When I started at the company 11 years ago, there were 24 of us in the department.  But these two people were great friends and co-workers.  This is not the first place we had worked together.  In fact one of the ladies, we had work together for over 24 years at different places. 

So today I'm going to walk into the office with only 4 of us left.  We have no idea how we're going to do the jobs of seven people.  We haven't had raises in 4 years and in fact, make less money due to the rising cost of health insurance than I did 4 years ago.  I'm sure the cost of insurance will go up again this year. 

There is no rhyme or reason as to who they picked to lay off.  1 of the ladies had less time with the company and the other had more time with the company than I did.  We all basically did the same job.  I don't want to go to the place anymore.  They say they are a family friendly place to work but that is not true any more.  They've hired on 6 new people in the that 2 weeks than they lay off a bunch of people this week.  It wasn't only my department hit, every department in the company lost at least 1 person.  And it wasn't the new hires that got let go either. 

I've been with this company 11 years.  I think it is time to start looking for another job, in another industry.  I just don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

I don't know how much work I'll get done today as the boss said we're going to have to regroup to figure out how to try to make this work.  She didn't know it was happening until yesterday morning and she was really mad when she found out they were letting two of her people go.  She had no say in the matter or who they let go.  She stood in the hallway and cried with us.

Should be a stress filled day, month, rest of the year.  And I feel so guilty for still having a job and my friends not having theirs. 

Cutting my hair

So on the way home from work today I stopped and got my hair cut.  7 inches cut off.  Now that does sound like a lot and it is but my hair was down past my butt.  I was always sitting on it.  Shutting it in the car door or in the filing cabinets at work.  Now it is just past my waist. 

R is away so he doesn't know I cut hair and I'm not going to tell him.  I want to see how long it takes him to notice.  He usually takes a before and after picture but it wasn't that much (not really). 

It really needed to be cut.  It had been 5 years since I had cut it so it had a lot of split ends.  I started with just having 3 inches cut but then she showed me that to get all the split ends it would take another 4 inches, so I told her to do it.  Just do it before I run.  She sold me some conditioner to just after I wash it to help with not get split ends.  My hair grows quickly so I'm hoping within the next 6 months it will be back to being below my butt again.  So I can complain about getting it shut in the car door, filing cabinets.   :)

My head does fill a little lighter or maybe that is from the flu shot I got yesterday.

Being without him

I'm finding out what life would be like without R in it and I don't like it.  R left Monday and won't be back until Thursday. 

I've had to deal with problems at the house (R usually takes care of these things). 

There have been problems at work. 

I got the flu shot and it made me sick. 

The cats have been grumpy because he is gone (and so have I). 

It's been very lonely without him.  :(

I don't like this life without him.  I want him home and I still have two days before he is back here.  I know he will be tired when he gets back from his trip and will want to just have a quiet night.  Life is much easier with R home.  I know what to expect.  What to do.  When to do it.  I want him home.

I've never minded being alone before but this time has been different.  I think with my Gram passing recently I just need him here with me not away.  Knowing he is close, just a few minutes drive away not hours away is a big difference. 

Come home soon my Sir.